My Second Annual Draft Poem
Last year I set my second draft of the season to rhyme. It was so popular and I had so many requests to do it again this year… that, well, I did. Hope it lives up to the original. Enjoy!
‘Twas Labor Day Weekend when I awoke in my bed
to the scream of my alarm and a pound in my head.
A swig of beer and two advil should do the trick,
It’s drafting time, whether or not I am sick.
I race to my laptop and power up the ol’ Mac,
snag some cheat sheets and of course a hangover snack.
All systems are go and the crew is on line
I’ll be picking fourth, which to me is just fine.
AP, CJ, and Jones-Drew all fall in the top three,
so I grab Ray Rice, knowing his receptions are key.
In the second round I’m looking for a receiver,
with a gulp and prayer I tap LFitz and become a believer.
I want a QB, but the best are off the board.
Instead, I decide it’s running backs I shall hoard.
Pierre Thomas looks good, a regular Chi-town guy,
so I add him to the roster with nary a sigh.
Heading into the fourth and I need me a flanker,
so I pick up Crabtree and hope he’s no wanker.
This league plays two backs, three receivers, and no flex,
I’m forced to draft Garcon without a moment to vex.
No longer a Bear, I next add Jones to my bench
Stop laughing, I’m serious, this dude is a mensch.
Enough picking with my heart, it’s time to get real
I make Cooley my end now that his leg is all healed.
Despite a bad preseason, I’ve got faith in BTwice
I could talk about Favre, but instead I’ll be nice.
Two thirds of the way through with five more to go,
I make a move for Hightower cuz Wells is so slow.
My headache’s returned and my eyes feel like lead
Gotta grab me a kicker and hop back into bed.
With a smile on my face… I pick and then bail,
Let’s just say, Janikowski is no longer avail.
Team: Soldier for Ditka
Stats: 12 team standard Yahoo! scoring league, 15 round snake draft
Starters (for now):
Kevin Kolb QB
Larry Fitzgerald WR
Michael Crabtree WR
Pierre Garcon WR
Ray Rice RB
Pierre Thomas RB
Chris Cooley TE
Sebastian Janikowski K
Bench (for now):
Thomas Jones RB
Bernard Berrian WR
Tim Hightower RB
Matthew Stafford QB
Devery Henderson WR